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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26374102">Lovesick</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/KennyMcCormickSouthPark/pseuds/KennyMcCormickSouthPark'>KennyMcCormickSouthPark</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>South Park</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Blood, Butters is trans, F/M, Gay Male Character, Graphic Depictions of Illness, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, idk how to tag</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 07:42:13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,958</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26374102</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/KennyMcCormickSouthPark/pseuds/KennyMcCormickSouthPark</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a story about Kyle getting the Hanahaki disease because Stan rejects him. Will he survive or not? it's written from Kyle's persective.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Kyle Broflovski/Stan Marsh, Stan Marsh/Wendy Testaburger</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I wake up and grunt as I stretch myself out, some of my joints popping as I do so. It is seven in the morning, earlier than I would wake up on normal occasions. But today isn't a day like any other and it makes me nervous, because today I am going to confes my true feelings to my super best friend, Stanley Marsh. Yes, you read that right, I'm into boys, My best friend to make things even worse. I have created feeling stronger than just friendship towards Stan. And that's when I realised I'm gay. That was 3 years ago. I'm sixteen now. I haven't changed much since childhood. I'm still that red haired Jew with a terrible temper and Cartman still manages to piss me off beyond beliefs. God, I hate that fat bastard. </p><p>I decide to get out of bed and put on my dark green jeans and the usual orange and green coat I usually wear. I grab my hat and put it on so it covers my red curls. I hate my hair. I hate it so much. When I was twelve I tried to cut it short but that made it look even worse, so I had let it grow into a nice bush on my head, small enough to hide it under my hat but big enough to not look like a total weirdo. I grab my glasses from my nightstand. When I was fourteen I noticed my sight wasn't very good so after getting it checked out I was told I needed glasses. I still have to wear them to this day. It wasn't really bad, people just see me as more of a nerd than I really am and sometimes that's annoying. </p><p>I walk to the bathroom to brush my teeth and take my insulin. I'm diabetic. It is manageble if I take my insulin three times a day, sometimes one time extra but that depends on how much and what I eat. Eating, I hate it. I'm really self conscious about my body, think I'm fat and need to lose weight. I don't care that other people tell me I am underweight and look unhealthy, they're wrong. I bearely eat, only take a small snack when my blood sugar is dangerously low. I'm used to the feeling of hunger, actually it's kind of soothing. </p><p>I finish brushing my teeth and inject myself with insulin before going downstairs. I greet Ike, who is sitting at the kitchen table eating cereal, with a small nod. He doesn't even acknowledge me and just continues staring at the screen of the laptop in front of him, on which is playing a reaction video of some popular Youtuber. I sigh and shake my head before grabbing my backpack and putting on my shoes. "Have fun at school, Ike, and don't be late again." I then walk out of the door. It had became a habit to tell that to my little brother before I would go to school. I am basically the one taking care of him because our parents are always fighting and don't pay attention to their sons. I do the cooking, the cleaning and take care of Ike all by myself for over four years now. It is hard to fit it in with my study, but I can manage. I guess... </p><p>I walk to school and to my locker. I look around to see if Stan is already here, but he isn't. No, of course he isn't. It's 7:30 a.m. For Mozes' sake, I can be so stupid at times. No one is this early at school. I take my books from my locker and decide to go sit in class already. I take place behind my school desk and open a book to read. The Lord Of The Rings; the felllowship of the ring, my favorite book. I can't focus on reading right now so I put my book away again. </p><p>I massage my temples to try and release some stress. I keet feeling anxious and stressed out about how Stan will react. I mean, I know he's bisexual but I have no idea if he returns my feelings. He broke up with Wendy last week, for the fifteenth time this month. Their relationship was the most unstable thing in whole South Park. They keep breaking up and then a few days later they would be back together, but this time they last more than a week without eachother already so I think it's safe to make a move on Stan. </p><p>I hear someone enter the classroom and snap out of my daze. Looking up from the school desk I have been staring at I see Kenny sitting down a few seats away from me. The boy had his hood up, as if he is trying to hide something. Kenny rarely wears the hood of his old orange parka up anymore, only if something is wrong. "Hey, Kenny. What's the matter?" I break the silence. Kenny doesn't look at me as he answers. "I'm fine. thanks for asking." his voice was sad and quiet. Worry immediately washes over me. I get up and walk over to Kenny. "You know you can tell me anything, right? We're friends." I put my hand on his back. Kenny flinches at the toutch, as if he is scared I will do something to him.</p><p>I frown a bit "And I will certainly never hurt you" Kenny looks up at me and I gasp when I see his beat up face. "Who did that to you...?" I ask after a moment of silence. "No one. I just got into a fight, that's all." He replies with a monotone voice. I know there's more up but I just nod and pat his back. "Be more careful next time. Okay?" I sit back down and stare at a page of my book, trying to read but still unable to focus. </p><p>More and more people enter the class, but I take no notice of them. A few minutes later I feel someone sit down next to me. I look up at the person and smile when I see my super best friend and, hopefully, soon my boyfriend. "Hey, dude" Stan smiles at me. I smile back "Hello" I put my book in my bag and try to sound casual when I ask "hey, can I talk to you after school? I need to tell you something personally." I see Stan frown before he nods. "Sure" he then answers, before bending over and grabbing his books from his backpack and placing them open in front of him. </p><p>Clas starts, but my mind keeps wandering off to Stan. Ugh, I hate being in love. I anxiously check my watch every few minutes, wanting the day to pass quickly but also not, scared for whatever Stan's reaction may be. I catch myself staring at the raven heared boy when he looks back at me. He smiles. Oh goddamn it, I love that smile. The small dimples in his cheeks, the twinkle in his blue eyes, his beautiful, perfectly white teeth, everything. I feel my face heat up and quickly turn my attention back to my work, my face a bright red. I hear Stan chuckle and feel my face color even more. Damn it, Kyle, get a hang of yourself, for fucks sake. I take a few deep breaths and wait until I feel my face cooling down and the redness leave. </p><p>The rest of the day went without any further problems, luckily. It's now three p.m. and I'm waiting at the lockers for Stan while I nervously fiddle with my fingers. I keep repeating what I am going to tell him in my head. Stan, I love you. As in... a gay way. For 3 years already. Just a few simple sentences. I just have to tell him tha- </p><p>"Hi!" Stan disturbs my thoughts. I immediately grow anxious again and feel my cheeks color with a slight blush. "Hey, Stan" I say as I start fiddling with my fingers again. </p><p>"So, what was so important you wanted to talk to me in private?" he asks. </p><p>I take a few deep breaths before I speak up "I.. I eehm... have to tell you something important." I nervously look at him "Stan I... I love you. as in a... a gay way. F-for a few years now." I stutter. Goddamn it. my face heats up and I look away. </p><p>Stan remains quiet for ten... no... twenty seconds before he slowly says something. "Kyle... I'm so sorry. I'm with Wendy again." </p><p>I swear I can feel my heart break. Shatter into a milion pieces at these words. It hurts. I can feel tears well up in my eyes and keep looking at my shoes. "s-sorry.. I didn't know.." I pick up my backpack and run off because I feel the tears starting to spill. I should have known. They always get back together. Stupid Wendy. Stupid, naïve me. </p><p>I slam the door behind me and run up to my room where I throw my bag aside and lock the door. I allow myself to drop onto the bed and hug my pillow to my chest before breaking down crying, sobs wrecking my body painfully. I keep crying for a few minutes before I manage to calm myself down. I dry my tears and sniffle a bit before sitting up. I'm such a crybaby. Crying over a guy, come on. I'm not some weak girl. </p><p>Something tickles in my toath, causing me to cough rather violently. Something falls from my mouth and I catch it. In my hand lays a blue flower petal with a bit of blood on it. It's a petal from a Forget-me-not, Stan's favorite flower. This is strange, very strange. I throw the flower petal in the trash and go wash my hands. I'm a germaphobiac, so washing my hands I do very often. I scrubbed off my whole hands with soap and rinse them off briefly. I then dry them on a clean towel and walk back to my bedroom, laying down on my bed and alowing my eyes to close. </p><p>I drift off to sleep.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Chapter 2 of the fanfiction "lovesick"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Not much later I wake up. Apparently I had started to cough in my sleep. I quickly sit up and catch a new bloody, blue flower petal that came from my mouth. Gross and weird. I throw the petal in the trash can and wash my hands again. God this is so gross. Where do these things come from, and why do I cough them up? I finish washing my hands and dry them off before walking back to my bedroom. </p><p>As I walk past the stairs I can hear my parents screaming again. I want to walk further to my room but then I hear mom say my name. Are they fighting over me? What did I do this time? I quietly walk back to my room and sit on the bed. I start to drift off to sleep again. </p><p>Suddenly my door opens and I see mom standing in the doorway. "Kyle, bubba, can I have a talk with you?" She asks calmly. Too calmly. "eehm.. sure." I answer hesitantly. She sits down next to me on my bed and looks at me with a serious face. "Is it true that you like boys? Your friend Stanley just came to the door and told us what happened at school." </p><p>I feel like time freezes. I can only stare at my mom. Did Stan really tell that to my mom?! Why would he betray me like that? This is going to end badly. My mom says she isn't homophobic but keeps making homophobic comments all the time. I know she will never accept it that I'm gay, that's why I was never planning on telling her ever. I feel betrayed. Betrayed by Stan. </p><p>I realise mom is still waiting for an answer when she says my name "Kyle? Is it true or not?" </p><p>"I..." I try to start my sentence before I fall into a heavy coughing fit. I feel something rise up in my troath and clasp my hand over my mouth before jumping up and running to the bathroom. I stand over the toilet and continue to cough violently before a couple of flower petals, mixed with blood, fall from my mouth into the toilet. "What the *cough* fuck??" I look at it. I don't have much time to because suddenly mom walks in to the bathroom. I quickly flush the toilet, just in time. </p><p>"Bubba, are you okay?" she asks as she places a hand on my shoulder. I don't look up at her, i'm too scared to do so. "I'm fine." I shortly reply. I then tug myself out of her grasp and walk back to my room. Mom's footsteps follow me and when I try to close my door she stops me. "You still haven't answered my question, Kyle." </p><p>I sigh and sit down on my bed. I'm tired and not in the mood to talk right now, but if mom wants something it will happen or someone will get hurt. "It's true. Okay? I like him. I like guys. I'm gay. Homosexual." My reaction came out more angry than I meant, but I'm pissed off and just want her to go. Maybe not the best move, but I'm not thinking clearly right now. </p><p>Mom looks at me for a few seconds. Probably trying to get her anger under control. On her face was written shock and confusion. "Since when?" </p><p>"I realised it 3 years ago, when I started creating feelings for Stan." I sound grumpy and annoyed, but mom seems to ignore it. </p><p>"And why didn't you tell us?" </p><p>"Because I know you won't respect it and treat me like I'm 'sick' or 'just confused'. I'm NOT confused. I know damn well I like boys and have no feelings for girls" I raise my voice slightly to state my point. I cross my boney arms over my underweight chest and look at mom angrily. She, again, remains silent for a while before slowly talking, sounding as if she's surpressing a lot of anger. </p><p>"I will have a talk about this with your father." She then leaves the room. </p><p>I breath out shakily. That went pretty well actually. Better than I expected. I drop myself on my bed again. My chest still hurts and I feel weak and dizzy, probably because I haven't ate anything today yet. I measure my blood sugar level. As I expected, very low. I sigh and look around my room to find something to eat. Luckily there's an apple on my desk. I grab it and take a few bites before angrily throwing it out of my window. Great, now I have a stomach ache too. My stomach isn't used to food anymore, so everytime I eat something I get a stomach ache or just simply throw up. This time I am trying to keep it down and fortunately I manage to. </p><p>I decide to go make some homework or study to get my mind off of Stan and ignore the yelling voices downstairs. I am all set to go study when I start coughing again. God damn it, what the hell is wrong with me? I run to the bathroom and again cough up flower petals and blood into the toilet. I flush the toilet and go back to my room. I try to focus on studying but the curiousity to what is wrong with me takes the upper hand. I grab my phone and typed the symptoms in on Google. 'coughing up flowers and blood, pain in chest' is what i type. Some suggestions pop up on the screen. Some about lung problems and internal bleeding, but that didn't sound right. </p><p>I keep scrolling until my eye falls on an article "Hanahaki (flower cough disease)" I read out loud. "Hanahaki is a love disease in which the patient's lungs fill up with flowers, which they cough or throw up. The cause is a one-sided love, in which the other person doesn't return the patient's feelings. If the disease doesn't get cured the patient will eventually suffocate when their lungs are filled up with the flowers." I start to worry. "so... basically I'm Lovesick..?" I frown and continue to read. "There are two cures for the sickness. 1. When the other person returns the feelings the patient has for them. A strong friendship isn't enough." Okay. So that's not an option. "2. By surgery. But with the disease also the patient's feelings dissappear." That was the end of the article. I remain quiet for a while. So apparently I'm sick because Stan rejected me and I might die.</p><p>I take off my glasses and clean them, just so I am thinking of something else for a couple of seconds. In Mozes' name... I don't know what to think at the moment. Should I tell someone? No way. I'm not telling anyone. They will all thing I'm some weak girl or something. I shake my head and check my watch. It's 10:22 p.m. I should get ready for bed. I go for a quick shower and then put on my pajamas, brush my teeth, check my blood sugar level and lay down in my bed. I have placed a bucket next to my bed in case I will cough up more flower petals in the night. I close my eyes and try to sleep, but my mind is too crowded with thoughts and questions. I sigh and stare at the ceiling, unable to sleep.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>hey hey I hate my life. eh anyways here's chapter 2. I hope y'all enjoyed it. Sorry that it was so short. I'm not feeling so good and just need something to do while I slowly die.</p>
        </blockquote><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>if there's any spelling mistakes please don't hate on me and just tell me. English isn't my first language. i'm trying my best. I hope you enjoyed reading this fanfiction and mayyyyybe you can check out my Wattpad account some time? i'ts PIPtook. I will post this fanfiction there too and more! thank you :D</p></blockquote></div></div>
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